I’ve gone through intense feelings over the last months. It has not been easy. On the way, I have discovered how deep some of my reactions and metaphysic constructions can go. I can go much farther than I originally thought. Thing is, the latter is not good for my mental health.

Feelings drive me. They take control. And I don’t have tools or strength to stop them. At least, that’s what I thought.

It is indeed, hard for me. But I can do it. I thought I had it all under control, until I found this other side of me. He’s tougher than I thought. But he’s a part of me, and I’ve got to find a way to control him. He is me, of course. I thought I was strong. I was wrong. I have to train hard, and then, I’ll take command.

I know you now. I shall step into controlling you. Only then will I be at peace with myself.

And after I finally tame you, I’ll be stronger.